Friday, January 06, 2006

Proposed additions to Web Wanderer 6.0

Harry Wright III, Chief Communications Officer of Bigsoft Corporation, today announced extensions to their industry standard browser. An additional "Creationism" filter will be incorporated, to restrict access to websites that endorse theories of origins other than darwinism.

"Following the judgement in the Dover vs Kitzmiller Intelligent Design trial," said Wright, "it has become apparent that creationists are intent on overturning the American constitution, by encouraging schoolchildren to consider the possibility that time and chance isn't sufficient to explain the origin of all life. This innovation will allow public schools to ensure that their pupils don't unwittingly find themselves facing charges of treason."

The new filter, like the existing filters for nudity, sex, language and violence, will have different levels, which can be controlled by the computer administrator. At its least restrictive, it will simply block access to websites of organisations which have tried to get creationism into schools, or which have the word GENESIS in their URL. At its most restrictive, it will block access to any website which has expressed doubt about any aspect of darwinism, and possibly any that haven't made their position clear, just to be on the safe side.

"We are also aware of the fact that Richard Dawkins considers that people who teach their children to doubt darwinism are child abusers," said Wright. "We have no doubt that parents will be relieved that they will be able to let their children use the internet without them unwittingly exposing themselves to such disturbing material. We dread to think how unsettling it might be for a child to discover that some people might think that life isn't entirely devoid of ultimate meaning and significance."